访谈录 2011-08-02&08-04 王牌对决：大卫·莱特曼访问

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I went to Paris.

Wait, take us down the memory lane here, the guy in Paris is doing your show?

Yes, I found it on the twitte(r), you're one the twitte(r)?

No, I'm not.

Now, you gotta get on the twitte(r), Dave, that's what the kids are doing, they're on the twitte(r), they've got their names, and they say the things they like that vampires¹ with apes or the, those other things, oh, yes, so get on the twitter.

OK,

But somebody on the twitte had sent me this thing, this link, where a guy in France is do

What's the guy's name?

Jaco Assbag, that's his name, that's his name,

Jaco Assbag,

Jaco Assbag, that's his name, although I googled about the name of Arthur Assbag, I don't know why

What is an assbag? Is it S initial³, bag, or...

No, it's assbag, a-s-s-b.

Oh, it's one word, ok

yeah, it's like a douche bag, but French,

that's a name, dush bag in France.

Yeah, o yeah,

So you've decided⁴, alright, let's go visit him in Paris. 

Yeah, I thought I'll go to Farnce and I'll do a late night show in Paris,  because man, I remember when you took this show to London, it was a great success, everybody loved it, and I

Well, speak for yourself.

I'm saying that because those people will forget about this.

yeah, that's right. We're still counting the votes.

No, I lived in London at that time, and everybody loved that, and I , so I thought I wanna do that in Paris, and then he said, well , you can't  afford to actually rent a theater, or take a crew, so you can take some people that you know, we'll hire some cheapest cameramen.

Keep this, there's no money to go there and do a show?

No, no, so we got card table. 

You should talk to somebody about that.

Yeah, so I got a card table, and you know, I set up my little, you know, my late night talk show stand in the street, and I interviewed American tourists.

All over Paris?

All over Paris.

What a fantastic idea, and while you were there, you visitied some of the cultural icons⁵ in the city?

Yeah,

For example, explain this,

That's me rehearsaling to dance on stage of the Moonarudge.

Are you sure?

Yeah, yeah, that's me rehearsaling, that's some strange guy trying to touch my ass², he's like a monster,touch at me, so that's me getting ready,

You've got an assbag right behind you

Yeah, yeah, yeah,

At the Moonlanrudge, so I didn't realize you actually dance in a performence at the club.

Oh, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's one of the ... you gotta do there. yeah, yeah, right there, look at that, yeah, that's butted⁶ me there.

When will we be able to see these programs from Paris?

Next week.

Oh, that'll be great.

Next week that'll be on the CBS at the Tiffany network.

Right here, ok what else is coming up on the late nightshow?

Pretty much the same old crap apart from Niats, that's bold really, you know I, come up, do you remember the first time I come over here to talk to you about doing the late night show which I was do, I had done 7, I think at the time you've already done 4,000, and I , yes, I was, it was true, and I've done 7, and now I've done above 1400, 1500, and I have noticed that I am developing a sort of bitter cynical⁷ approach to life.

Welcome to the club.

Thank you, David

Craig Ferguson, ladies and gentlemen, the late nightshow from Paris beginning Monday, right here on CBS

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