托福写作开头切莫大意：举例分析

　　1、废话连篇急煞读者失败案例：

　　This topic is very interesting. I am very interested in talking about this topic. Because I am also a college student and I am not married……修改方案：开门见山 直奔主题In my opinion, it would not be a wise decision to allow college students to get married。

　　2、观点不明态度暧昧失败案例：

　　I think this topic is very hard to say. Because I am still very little, only 17, and not married, so this topic is very difficult for me……3、渐行渐远 离题千里失败案例：

　　I think to success, we must have a lot of important qualities. To have these important qualities, we must learn a lot of things, for example, English, music, and etc. We can learn these qualities from our teachers, our friends and from books. All in all, we can learn from many places。

　　4、中式英语人见人跪失败案例：

　　In our life, there are always some moments which make your heart flower opened angrily……The population problem is a very big problem. For example, in the city centers of Shanghai, we can always see people mountain people sea there。

　　Topic3- Is there fairness¹ in today’

　　I think in today’s society, there is no fairness in the business world. For example, I always chop² when I go out buy things……Being a nice person have many advantage. I believe if a person always does bad things, he will get “baoying”。

　　5、语法错误惨不忍睹失败案例：

　　About this problem, my think is if children behave badly, then parents are not right. Because teach child is parent’s responsibility³. So we also punish parents too besides children is also should。

　　6、过分简单没有重点失败案例：

　　This issue⁴ is surely⁵ very important, let’

　　7、用词不当表达不准失败案例：

　　I think college students should not be allowed to get married because they are very young and so we can’t take the responsibility to form a family。

　　8、意思重复徘徊不前失败案例：

　　My opinion on DINK families is that DINK families is not a good thing. And it is a bad thing. It brings no benefits⁶ to our society and it is even sometimes harmful to our society。

　　9、中国俗语随心翻译失败案例：

　　I think it is good to have a large family. Because we Chinese believe a sentence: “Many sons, many lucks”……正确说法：

　　We all know, our Chinese old fathers and grandfathers said: “Know is know, don’t know is don’t know”……Topic 3- Do you think one’

　　Chinese old words says very good: Dragon born dragon, phoenix⁷ born phoenix, rat’s son can make hole……I believe one sentence:“A good person is all life safe”. We Chinese people always say: “Good has good pay, bad has bad pay”。

　　10、观点武断脱离实际失败案例：

　　In my opinion, confidence⁸ is the most important thing for a person. All the successful people in the world are full of confidence. While those people who don’

　　I think to solve the traffic problem, very easy! For those who don’t obey the traffic rules, we should put all of them into prison. If we do that, I’

　　以上从许多学生的托福独立作文中总结出来、并参照了一些教材得出的托福写作考试中需避免的开头方式，希望考生们引以为戒。

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