智慧人生篇章 第67期:母亲的爱

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　　It was a mild summer evening and there were many children playing in their gardens. 那是一个夏季的傍晚，天气怡人，许多孩子在院子里玩耍。

　　Our new house was in a family friendly estate and despite trying to keep calm for the 40 minutes that we couldn't find him, 我们所处的小区氛围友好，每家每户都其乐融融。在寻找儿子下落的40分钟里我还能故作镇定，

　　I felt as if my life had stopped. There seemed to be no past and no future just a desperate present filled with every possible what if. 可当没找着他时，我感觉我的生命停止了。没有过去，也没有未来，只有充满着各种可能的绝望的当下。

　　He came back cheerfully on his bike having made some new friends and completely oblivious¹ to the desperate panic at home. 结交了几个新朋友后，儿子欢天喜地的骑着车回到家，完全没有察觉家中绝望恐慌的气氛。

　　40 minutes may have seemed like a lifetime to me but I was lucky because some people really do spend a lifetime living with the disappearance² of their child. 这40分钟对我而言像一生一般漫长，但我还算幸运，因为有些人真的一生都生活在失去孩子的痛苦中。

　　Winnie Johnson, the mother of Keith Bennett who was murdered by Ian Brady in 1964 died this weekend. She died at the age of 78, 维妮·约翰逊于本周末逝世，享年78岁。她的孩子基思·班尼特在1964年被伊恩·布拉迪杀害，

　　and 47 of those years had been spent looking for her son's body, the remains³ of which may still be somewhere on Saddleworth Moor⁴. 47年里，维妮·约翰逊一直在寻找孩子的遗体。遗体被藏匿在沙德伍兹沼泽一带，至今下落不明。

　　I grew up in West Yorkshire and would often pass the sign for Saddleworth as we drove along the motorway⁵. 我在西约克郡长大，驾车时总会在高速公路上经过指向沙德伍兹的路标。

　　They are bleak⁶ and rolling moors⁷ but like many I came to associate this place only with the tragic⁸ murders of innocent young lives. 荒凉的沼泽地势崎岖，但和许多人一样，我只能由它想起几个无辜的年轻人被人谋杀的悲剧。

　　Most of us can't even begin to imagine Winnie Johnson's torment⁹. The letters she wrote to Ian Brady with her pleas that perhaps he might in a moment of remorse¹⁰ tell her where Keith's body lay, 多数人都无法想像维妮·约翰逊所遭受的痛苦。她给伊恩·布拉迪写信，恳求他能因刹那的悔恨告诉她基思遗体的下落。

　　her desperation to give Keith a Christian¹¹ burial, before she died herself when she became ill. 她那时已身染疾病，不顾一切地想给伊恩一个基督教式的葬礼。

　　But it is her relentless¹² hope as a mother which makes this story even more poignant¹³. 然而，就是这位母亲的无尽的愿望使整个故事更加让人痛心。

　　Her hope that in finding Keith's remains she would have done all in her power as a mother and finally made peace with herself. 她希望尽一个母亲的全部力量来找到基思的遗体，从而与自己讲和。

　　But holding onto such hope must have been a kind of torment itself always demanding courage and patience. 不过坚持这种希望一定是种折磨，需要靠勇气和耐心来支撑。

　　Maybe Winnie Johnson's Christian faith gave her some solace¹⁴ in her darkest hours but I think that keeping faith in the face of despair is God's biggest challenge to us. 也许维妮·约翰逊的基督教信仰在黑暗的时光里给予她安慰，但我想，在绝望中坚持信仰是上帝给我们设下的最大挑战。

　　Her son was the victim of Brady's murder but she became the victim of his silence. 她的儿子成为布拉迪谋杀行为的受害者，而她则成为布拉迪沉默态度的受害者。

　　And although her family will continue this search they too may never find out. 尽管她的家人们将继续寻找，但他们可能依旧一无所获。

　　In trying to keep her son's memory alive she took flowers and toys to the moors. 为了使人们记住自己的孩子，维妮在沼泽地里布置了鲜花和玩具。

　　And perhaps in years to come it is this tender image which will gradually eclipse the dark secrets of these moors and the infamous¹⁵ faces of the murderer, 也许若干年后，这温馨的景象会渐渐冲淡这片沼泽地的秘密，渐渐模糊凶手穷凶极恶的面容。

　　an image in which lies the haunting hope of a mother's love.", 而这温馨的景象背后，是一位母亲满怀爱意的心愿。

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