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Unit 67
Some Kids Are Orchids1
Most of us think we know the kind of kid who becomes a killer2, and most of the time we are right. Boys commit about 85% of all youth homicides, and in those cases about 90% conform to a pattern in which the line from bad parenting and bad environment is usually clear. Through my work, I see these boys in the courtroom and in prison with depressing regularity3. Their lives start with abuse, neglect and emotional deprivation4 at home. Add the effects of racism5, poverty, and the drug and gang cultures, and it is not surprising that in a violent society like ours, damaged children become deadly teens.
But what about the other 10% of kids who kill: the boys who have loving parents and are not poor? What about smart privileged boys like Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris who killed over a dozen schoolmates in Columbine School? Are their parents to blame when these kids become killers6? I have learned as a researcher in youth homicide cases that the answer is usually no.
Most children are like dandelions; they thrive if given half a chance. Some are more like orchids. They do fine while young enough to be nurtured7 by loving parents, but wilt8 as adolescents subjected to peer competition, bullying9 and rejection10, particularly in big high schools. Research shows that while most fragile children do fine in early childhood, 50% have significant adjustment problems once they enter adolescence11. Then children respond to the influence of peers and the larger culture in the neighborhood and the nation. The US youth homicide rate is about 10 times higher than in Canada.
The "normal" culture of adolescence today contains elements that are so nasty that it becomes hard for parents and teachers to distinguish what in a teenager's talk, dress and taste in music, films and video games indicate psychological trouble and what is simply a sign of the times. Most kids who adopt the Mafia lifestyle, or have multiple body piercings, or listen to savage12 music, or play the video game Doom13 are normal kids caught in a toxic14 culture.
Intelligent kids with good social skills can be quite skillful at hiding who they really are from their parents. They may do this to avoid punishment, to escape being identified as "crazy", or to protect the parents they love from being disappointed or worried. Klebold successfully hid his inner turmoil15 from his loving parents. Anyway, how many parents are capable of thinking the worst of their son -- for example, that he has murderous fantasies, or that he could go so far as to acting16 them out? Even if parents know their child as an individual, they may not understand what he is capable of when in company of another boy. Though it appears from public accounts that Harris was more prone17 t violence than Klebold, neither kid was likely to go on this killing18 rampage alone.
I think many of us are too ready to blame good parents for how their children cope with a violent and coarse society. Even loving, attentive19 parents can lose children who are temperamentally vulnerable -- if they develop a secret life, get caught up in the dark side of the culture and form dangerous peer alliances. And that's the scary part for any parent to acknowledge.
1 orchids | |
n.兰花( orchid的名词复数 ) | |
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2 killer | |
n.杀人者,杀人犯,杀手,屠杀者 | |
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3 regularity | |
n.规律性,规则性;匀称,整齐 | |
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4 deprivation | |
n.匮乏;丧失;夺去,贫困 | |
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5 racism | |
n.民族主义;种族歧视(意识) | |
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6 killers | |
凶手( killer的名词复数 ); 消灭…者; 致命物; 极难的事 | |
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7 nurtured | |
养育( nurture的过去式和过去分词 ); 培育; 滋长; 助长 | |
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8 wilt | |
v.(使)植物凋谢或枯萎;(指人)疲倦,衰弱 | |
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9 bullying | |
v.恐吓,威逼( bully的现在分词 );豪;跋扈 | |
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10 rejection | |
n.拒绝,被拒,抛弃,被弃 | |
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11 adolescence | |
n.青春期,青少年 | |
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12 savage | |
adj.野蛮的;凶恶的,残暴的;n.未开化的人 | |
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13 doom | |
n.厄运,劫数;v.注定,命定 | |
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14 toxic | |
adj.有毒的,因中毒引起的 | |
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15 turmoil | |
n.骚乱,混乱,动乱 | |
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16 acting | |
n.演戏,行为,假装;adj.代理的,临时的,演出用的 | |
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17 prone | |
adj.(to)易于…的,很可能…的;俯卧的 | |
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18 killing | |
n.巨额利润;突然赚大钱,发大财 | |
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19 attentive | |
adj.注意的,专心的;关心(别人)的,殷勤的 | |
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