《柯南脱口秀》第134期:百万富翁

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we are facing a crisis brought on by improper² disposal of a virtually inedible³ Easter candy. 我们正面临由于不当丢弃不可食复活节糖果而引发的危机

I'm talking,of course,about peeps.Every year at easter,millions of peeps are left uneaten. 我说的就是 动物棉花糖 每年复活节 数百万的动物棉花糖无人食用

These peeps,which are not biodegradeable,accumulate Fland fills and wash down storm drains,resulting to great harm to local wildlife. 这些棉花糖不可降解 会逐渐堆积 冲下下水系统 并对当地野生动物造成严重伤害

That's why this year we are urging people to recycle uneaten peeps. 所以今年我们敦促人们回收不可食动物棉花糖

Peeps are made from a versatile⁴ material that has many uses including,leveling tables. 动物棉花糖的材料是可爱而多用途的材料 它有很多用处 比如 垫桌子

Scrubbing caked-on grease,a great substitute for packing peanuts,Peep nuts if you will. 刷粘锅油脂 代替缓冲泡沫 可以称为缓冲棉花糖

Protective sporting gear.Medical implants⁵ as a BPA Free plastic.Home insulation,it's slightly less toxic⁶ it than asbestos. 做保护性体育工具 当做医疗植入物 隔音 比石棉的毒性稍稍小一些

Military training.Watch out,ISIS.And our long-term plan,sending peeps to space,so man can eventually set up a colony on planet peep. 军队训练 小心哦 伊斯兰国 长期计划是 将棉花糖送入太空 让人类最终能在棉花糖星球建立殖民地

So think before you throw those peeps away.You can make a difference,from my peeps to yours. 所以扔掉棉花糖之前三思啊 你可以做出改变 就像我这样

What else is going on?I heard something interesting.I heard that guy Robert dirst was indicted⁷ for illegal possession of a gun.That's the latest news. 还有什么 我听说件有趣的事 我听说那个罗伯特·德斯特被控非法持械 这是最新消息

Oh,yeah,that creepy guy from that HBO documentary "The Jinx"?That's right,he's a weird,old millionaire. 就是那个纪录片《厄运》里很吓人的那个家伙吧 没错 怪异的老百万富翁

A lot of news about him.he's been connected with three different murders,maybe even more.He gives everyone the willies. 新闻对他有很多报道 他与三起不同的凶案相关 甚至可能更多 他让人十分胆寒

Every time I think about him,I get the willies.I think he's really creepy. 每次想到他 就禁不住胆寒 我觉得他好吓人

 

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