趣味英语第147期:周一早上怎么起床

（单词翻译）

Tacodrums. Same.

下面是Tacodrums的问题。我有同样的困扰。

"How do I get up on Monday morning? It's hard."

“周一早上怎么起床？那真是太难了。”

Like the rest of us: with a struggle.

和我们其他人一样：努力起来。

It's hard for me too, trust me. You have to suffer — suffer through it.

那对我来说同样很难，相信我。你必须熬过去。

First thing I do, even before I pee, is I make my coffee. Try that.

我做的第一件事，甚至在上厕所前就要做的，是泡咖啡。你可以试试。

Ask someone in the morning to pour water on your head.

让其他人早上往你的头上倒水。

Play loud music. That's what I do.

大声放音乐。我就是这么做的。

You should start by scratching¹ your back with something. And then maybe wash your face, brush your hair, and get ready.

你应该先用某个东西抓背。然后再洗脸、梳头，做准备。

Have your mom just pull you out of bed, 'cause that's what I did through high school, and it worked.

让你妈妈把你从床上拉出来，因为我妈在我上高中时一直是这样做的，那很有效。

Make your mom get mad at you. Just say, "Mom, just get mad at me in the morning so, um, I'll wake up."

让你妈妈对你生气。你要跟你妈妈说，“妈妈，早上要对我生气，这样我才能醒过来。”

I normally² set, like, five alarms, so you could try that.

我通常会定5个闹钟，你可以试一下。

Set nine alarms, and space them out three and a half minutes apart.

定9个闹钟，每个闹钟的间隔为3分半。

You gotta do it the same way I do it. You hit snooze, you sleep another 10 minutes. You hit snooze, you sleep another 10 minutes. You hit snooze, you sleep another 10 minutes. And then by that time, your mom should be in your room yelling³ at you to go to school.

你要像我这样做。按停闹钟，再睡10分钟。再按停闹钟，再睡10分钟。再次按停闹钟，再睡10分钟。然后你妈妈就会冲进你房间喊你去上学。

Think about all the awesome⁴ people that are gonna be at school, 'cause I'm sure you have friends. I mean, your name is Tacodrums. How do you not have friends?

想想学校里那些优秀的人，我确定你一定有朋友。你的名字是Tacodrums。你怎么会没有朋友呢？

If you drink on Sunday more than one bottle of whiskey, I don't think you can wake up on Monday morning.

如果你周日喝了不止一瓶威士忌，我想你周一早上不可能醒来。